Even in absurdity, sacrament.    Even in hardship, holiness.    Even in doubt, faith.     Even in chaos, realization.   Even in paradox, blessedness.   

Home of Theodore "jay" Joslin; divinity student, author, wingnut, and queer nature boy. Dedicated to the Unity and Sacredness of All-That-Is, including and especially you.


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February 2003
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Digging the Immaterial;
Yet another human
pondering the Universe
and what it means to be
alive and well within It.
by jay joslin

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04/06/2003 to 04/12/2003
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( inside jay's head ) 01/26/2003 - 02/01/2003
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posting under the influence

Saturday, 22 February, 2003...........................................................

"Dubya meets Seuss"

The Whos down in Whoville liked this country a lot,
But the Grinch in the White House, he really didnot.
He didn't arrive by the will of the Whos,
But stole the election he really did lose.
Vowed to "rule from the middle," then installed his regime.
(Did this really happen or is it a bad dream?)

Didn't listen to voters, just friends he was pleasin'
Now, please don't ask why, no one quite knows the reason.
It could be his heart wasn't working just right.
It could be, perhaps, that he wasn't too bright.
But no doubt the most likely reason of all,
Is that both brain and heart were two sizes too small.
In times of great turmoil, this was the bad news,
To have a big gummint that ignores its Whos.

But the Whos shrugged their shoulders, went on with their work,
Their duties as citizens so casually did shirk.
They shopped at the mall and the watched their T.V.
They drove their gas guzzling big S.U.V.
Oblivious to what had gone down in D.C.
Ignoring the threats to their democracy.
They read the same papers that ran the same leads,
Reporting what only served corporate needs.
(For the policies affecting the lives of all nations
Were made by the giant U.S. Corporations.)
Big business grew fatter, fed by its own greed,
And by people who shopped for the things they don't need.

But amidst all the apathy came some unrest,
The Whos came to see we were fouling our nest.
And those who cared for the ideals of this nation
Began to discuss and exchange information.
Things missing in all of the corporate-owned news
Of FTAA meetings and CIA coups.
Of drilling for oil and restricting their rights.
They published some books and created Websites
Began to write letters and use their e-mail
(Though Homeland Security might send them to jail!)

What began as a whisper soon grew to a roar,
These things going on they just couldn't ignore.
They started to rise up and fight City Hall,
Let their voices be heard, as they rose to the call,
To vote, to petition, to gather, dissent,
To question the policies of the "president."

As greed gained in power and power knew no shame
The Whos came together, sang "Not in our name!"
One by one from their sleep and their slumber they woke
The old and the young, and all kinds of good folk,
The black, brown and white, the gay, bi- and straight,
All united to sing, "Feed our hope, not our hate!
Stop stockpiling weapons and aiming for war!
Stop feeding the rich, start feeding the poor!
Stop storming the deserts to fuel SUV's!
Stop telling us lies on our mainstream TV's!
Stop treating our children as a market to sack!
Stop feeding them Barney, Barbie and Big Mac!
Stop trying to addict them to lifelong consuming,
In a time when severe global warming is looming!
Stop sanctions! They're killing the kids in Iraq!
Start dealing with ours who are strung out on crack!"

A mighty sound started to rise and to grow,
"The old way of thinking, it simply must go!
No more God versus Allah, Muslim against Jew
With what lies ahead, well, it simply won't do!
No American dream that cares only for wealth
Ignoring the need for community health.
The rivers and forests are demanding their pay,
If we're to survive, we must walk a new way.
No more excessive and mindless consumption
Let's sharpen our minds up, and garner our gumption.
For ideas are simple, but practice is hard,
And not to be won by a poem on a card.
It needs the ideas and the acts of each Who,
So let's get together and plan what to do!"

And so they all gathered from all 'round the Earth
And from it all came a miraculous birth.
The hearts and the minds of the Whos they did grow,
Three sizes to fit what they feel and they know.
While the Grinches all shrank from their hate and their greed,
From bearing the weight of their every foul deed.

So from that day onward the standard of wealth,
Was whatever fed the Whos' spiritual health.
They gathered together to revel and feast,
And thanked all who pitched in to conquer their beast.
For although our story pits Grinches 'gainst Whos,
The true battle lies in what we daily choose.
For inside each Grinch is a tiny small Who,
And inside each Who is a tiny Grinch too.
One thrives on love and one thrives on greed.
Who will win out? It depends who you feed!

via email from Robin, thanks honey.

jaybird wrote this at 20.47 EST| entry link| your thoughts?|

"Rainy Day, Dream Away"

It's a beautiful rainy day, one of those rare constant showerings that makes for good sleeping and kaleidoscopic dreams. I went out with the traditional every-other-Friday gang last night, and in the midst of my midnight dinner it struck me that everyone at the table, everyone at the restaurant and beyond it's windows, were utterly beautiful. I mean the deeper sense of the word... they were shining. Even those to whom I would typically have difficulty drawing that conclusion with were brightly and clearly beautiful. I don't think it was the beer, nor the faux-Cajun mishmash on my plate, but just one of those things when God pokes and you have to pay attention.

At the same time, there were several attractive menfolk that kept drawing my attention in an entirely different way. Is my rutting season on? I think so. I haven't had a good old fashioned romantic encounter, failed or faint, in a month or two. My housemate has a friend staying over that is over the top in all ways, but is obviously straight. I keep having this problem with my gay-dar and chasing after false or misleading transponder signals ( I could use a hardware upgrade ). It might just be because most gay men don't do much for me... around here many choose to stereotype themselves and 9 out of 10 are swishy, which is fine for them but doesn't really do much for me. The remaining 1 out of 10 is either myself or an ancient leather-clad daddy cruising for 18 year olds. Bitter? Pas moi. Just very, very ready, to find that elusive number that is hiding somewhere between myself and the rest of the world.

At any rate, it's a slow news day, good for durning up the Jimi and down the NPR.

jaybird wrote this at 10.51 EST| entry link| your thoughts?|

Friday, 21 February, 2003...........................................................

"Next to the Last Book of Neuteronomy"

These are excerpts from the comedy sketch I've written for the gig on Sunday night, and I present them just for the heck of it.

And now, Holy Scripture, but first a word from our sponsor:

It’s a big big sale this week at Soul-Mart, where this week we’ve got deep discounts on store-brand salvation. That’s right, with these sturdy plastic containers are guaranteed to save your soul and maintain freshness for up to a week in you’re your fridge or freezer. Having trouble letting go? Attachment got you down? Why not try Easy-Flow, 30% off this week only! With this handy ritualistic device, you can dissolve your worries and disclaim your incompitencies by immersing them in thrice blessed organic sulfuric acid, also good for cleaning up after parties. Finally, angels are great to have around but pesky wing sizes can make for trouble in small apartments or when travelling. So try Angel-Clippers, buy one get one free! Now your guardian angel will never bop you in the head again while flitting around excitedly! So come on down to Soul-Mart, where the quality is eternal but the price is finite!

And now, Holy Scripture! Hold on while I access it...

Welcome to the Akashic Records. Press 1 for sales, 2 for service, or smack your Third Eye for Holy Scripture. (Hits forehead) Thank you, please hold on while I try that extension. Welcome to the Holy Scripture department of Akashic Records. Today’s selection comes from the Next to the Last Book of Neuteronomy:

And so the disciples gathered to hear the Prophet speak, who issued from his mighty lips these blessings, showering the good people with wisdom and little bits of dribble. This He said from on High but down low:

Thou shalt not be persnippity or otherwise dreary and awful. Thou shall, however, love thy neighbor with all thy heart and soul, that ye may borrow things from him without having to steal from his shed out back. God says unto you that She doesn’t like it all that much when you stealeth, but She knoweth a good bargain when She seeth it. Furthermore, thou shalt give of thine heart to strangers, show mercy unto them, take them into your house and witheth them and dineth them. But don’t do anything the Lord Herself wouldn’t do. Thou shalt not do battle with foreign peoples for thine own gain in far away lands unless thou possesseth the political clout and the media advisors to make it appear a compassionate and all around nice thing to do. Thou shalt be a steward over all the Earth, handing out little packs of pretzels and assuring that belts are fastened before takeoff. And, by the way, saith the Prophet, Whooever said that bit about Lillies of the Valley not spinning obviously wasn’t taking the good stuff.

The Prophet at this point stood before the disciples, who were enraptured at these pronouncements and silent with Holy Anticipation. The Prophet, with His hands outstretched to the sky, brought down one arm under the pit of the other, with which He made a rude noise, and He galloped on his She-Goat into the sunset, and before His Heavenly Countenance disappeared to the disciples, he yelled to them this last great pronouncement: the shortest, simplest story ever was that of the creation of the universe, but it has taken us forever to figure it out. Tally-ho He cried, and he ascendeth into the next scene. Amen. To return to the main menu, slap your forehead again.

Thank You.

jaybird wrote this at 20.45 EST| entry link| your thoughts?|

Thursday, 20 February, 2003...........................................................

"One sunrise closer"

"Ride Captain ride, upon your mystery ship."

"Come sail away, come sail away."

"Distant shores are calling me."

Scanning the radio dial, loafing in-between frequencies, certain snippets stick out not like sore thumbs, but like hitchhiker's thumbs, testing the winds and the directions of their movement. Tonight, let's say a breeze is blowing from the south, rustling my hair and my dreams and filling me with journey breath. Haiti is calling.

"I am on a lonely road and I am travelling, travelling..."

I went to a meeting tonight that detailed the itinerary and nitty gritty of the April jaunt. It's a dive in to a world so vastly different from our own, that one can be assured that upon returning it is not you who returns but a new being in your clothes. To some, it would inspire great fear to step into a place that appears so broken and magled. To others, the goal is to reveal the heaven in a place some would call hell, raising up from a bloodied Earth a blossom of hope.

"A dream is like a river, ever changing as it flows..."

Most white people who go there aren't there for the scenery, but too many go down to evangelize and attepmt to convert; something I find not only incredibly rude but also a strong indice of cowardice. To wish to change the belief system of another culture is not an act of love, but an act of fear. Most missionary work I find to be a fear of difference, a spiritual xenophobia. I have been asked if mine is a mission trip... sure, I'm on a mission to accomplish something, to change something, but that thing that needs the changing is within me. I cannot change the heart or mind of another, but I can hold an orphaned baby or nail shingles on a roof. I cannot change the soul of another but I can hold out my hand as a fellow human, and laugh and cry with them even if we don't understand eachother. I will be there to witness, to learn, and to love. It's the least I can do, and sometimes, it's the most I can do.

"...the truth you might be running from is so small, but it's as big as the promise, the promise of a coming day."

We may attend a voudoun ceremony while down there. Voudoun is incredibly misunderstood, a perception bred by Hollywood exploitation and the western queasiness over unfamiliar ritual. It aims to maintain a balance in the universe... that darkness is inevitable, so lightness must match it and keep it in check. It is a blending of faiths from the many tribes brought to Haiti by the colonial French from western Africa, including symbolism from the now-extinct Arawak indian tribes and from Catholocism, the latter a kind of 'sheild' to protect them from zealous persecution. Many affairs are conducted in secret, but some rituals are open to the uninitiated... yet you must have a purpose. You don't call up the spirits for nothing, so you best be prepared. I'm already calling, slowly and quitely, in my own way. My purpose? How can I best serve the Holy in this lifetime o'mine? Into what modality should I pour my vision? From whom do I have the most to learn?

"Look out of any window, any morning, any evening, any day. Maybe the sun is shining, birds are winging, or rain is falling from a heavy sky. What do you want me to do, to do for you to see you through?"

I've turned off the radio and the house is somewhat still. The cats are a little restless and the housemates zing to and fro, cabinets creak and floorboards sigh. Haiti seems so far away right now, from today, from this way of life, from the to-do list and sarcasm of late-week emails. Yet as surely as morning will come, the house will be abuzz again and that step on foreign soil will be one sunrise closer. I think this is going to be a very, very important time in my life. Sure, anytime is the right time, and anyplace is the right place, but time and place are just inkstains, will outweighs when and where, and intent makes the magic.


jaybird wrote this at 23.55 EST| entry link| your thoughts?|

"For the Mirthday Girl"

A Flock of birds,
A flood of stars,
A swirl of river,
A swooning of sun...
These none can give to you-
they move through you, to you,
even by you.
A dream of becoming,
A dance of being,
A cadence of emerging,
A chorus of courage...
These none can give you...
you harvest them yourself from time, from chance,
even from love.
What can be given?
What cannot be taken?
A hand,
A hope,
A wish,
A wink.
These are yours, left on the doorstep of your soul,
bundled with roses, sweets and words,
to take in and raise up,
to exalt with a smile.
You may call that a gift...
see yourself reflected within it, and in the whole world
on this day of joy.
Forward into the light!
Not given, not taken,
but you shine so brightly...

jaybird wrote this at 01.10 EST| entry link| your thoughts?|

“Thy love is a light that burns brighter than the sun and leaveth nary a shadow.
‘Tis in the folds of thine soul where I resteth mine eyes and dream.”

~Aderynlloer of Pont Newydd

jaybird wrote this at 01.00 EST| entry link| your thoughts?|

Wednesday, 19 February, 2003...........................................................





FIRE OF WATER. You are tolerant toward others and are good at easing tension. You make others feel calm and understood. You are patient in even difficult situations or with difficult people. You would make a good therapist or healer. Because of your accepting nature, you are able to have friends from all walks of life. People seek you out for advice because you always know what to do/say for the betterment of everyone involved.
Quiz
created by Polly Snodgrass.

jaybird wrote this at 17.25 EST| entry link| your thoughts?|

"Best of Protest"

Signs from the various worldwide protests, Feb. 15th:

Drunken frat boy drives country into ditch.

Bush/Cheney: Malice in Blunderland

Who would Jesus bomb?

War begins with 'Dubya'.

Bush is proof that empty warheads can be dangerous.

Let's bomb Texas, they have oil too.

How did our oil get under their sand?

If you can't pronounce it, don't bomb it.

Daddy, can I start the war now?

1000 points of light and one dim bulb.

Sacrifice our SUV's, not our children.

Preemptive impeachment.

No George, I said Mac Attack.

Look, I'll pay more for gas!

He is a moron and a bully.

It's the stupid economy.

Draft Richard Perle.

Draft dodgers shouldn't start wars.

War is sweet to those who haven't tasted it (Erasmus).

Pillow fights only.

Our grief [over 9/11] is not a cry for war.

Different Bush, same shit.

Stop the Bushit.

Just war/just oil.

You don't have to like Bush to love America.

Bushes are for pissing on.

Bush-Cheney-Rumsfeld: the asses of evil.

Stop the excess of evil [gives figures for the multibillion dollar
defense budget].

$1 billion a day to kill people -- what a bargain.

Consume --> Consume --> Bomb --> Bomb --> Consume --> Consume

What's the difference between me & God? He might forgive Bush, but I don't.

Smush Bush.

America, get out of the Bushes.

It's time to trim the Bush.

Pro-lifers: Wake from Bush's propaganda spell -- war kills innocent children.

Don't make me come back here [to a peace rally] again.

Disarm Bush too.

Big brother isn't coming -- he's already here.

Empires fall.

An eye for! an eye leaves the whole world blind (Gandhi).

Impeach the squatters.

Mainstream white guys for peace.
(Sign held by three mainstream-looking white guys)

Hans Blix -- look over here.

Let Exxon send their own troops.

Curious, George? -- get a clue.

Destroy Florida. [It could happen again]

There's a terrorist behind every Bush.

How many bodies per mile?

SUV owners roll over for terrorism.

We can't afford to rule the world.

War is so 20th century!

9-11-01: 15 Saudis, 0 Iraqis.

While you were watching the war, Bush was raping America.

Don't waive your rights while waving your flag.

Leave Desert Storm to the desert.

Drop Bush not bombs.

Sacrifice our SUVs, not our children.

Fighting for peace is like f___ing for virginity.

Bush is to Christianity as Osama is to Islam.

I asked for universal health care, all I got was this lousy stealth bomber!

America's problems won't be solved in Iraq.

War is not a family value.

2 sided poster, one side has a picture of a chubby feline, with the
words: GOOD FAT CAT other side has a picture of Cheney,
with the words: BAD FAT CAT

Colorfully dressed drag queen carrying a sign that says: I am the bomb.

Picture of the peace symbol: back by popular demand.

A picture of Bush with a red-stained upper lip: Got blood?

A picture of Bush saying "Why should I care what the American
people think? They didn't vote for me."

A picture of Bush saying "Ask me about my lobotomy."

via an email forward. Thanks Lou.

jaybird wrote this at 16.59 EST| entry link| your thoughts?|

"Busy Body"

I've been too busy... when you're this busy it should be a warning sign, but no, I tend to keep on truckin' no matter how much piles up. I think I like the rush to complete projects, and the ability to multitask in a manic, depreaved sort of way. The trick is to get through the pile eventally before the pile gets through with you.

At any rate I think I've been ripped off on ebay to the tune of about 110 clams. If I have'nt heard anything tomorrow it'll be time to do the fraud dance. These adventures in e-commerce are always so rewarding.

Meanwhile, here's some think food.

jaybird wrote this at 01.17 EST| entry link| your thoughts?|

Monday, 17 February, 2003...........................................................

"Beautiful Causes and Special Effects"

Hado.net's amazing article on how water can be profoundly effected on a structural level by praying, chanting or even simply speaking over it led Joshua and I to discuss at length how mutible the universe really is. If water can react to powerful thought / energy forms, can't the air, can't the space between molecules, can't the sub-quanta? Dr. Emoto's work validates some of the most ancient beliefs in mysticism... that by doing something, anything, we have created a tangible, real change in the fabric / flux of reality. The direction and tone of our action literally creates the outcome. Just like Huna, Alchemy, and virtually all of the mystical traditions seem to say, what we do the Universe we do to ourselves, and what we do to the least [microcosm] we do to God [macrocosm].

We leave wide wakes and wild tides in our midst every day, and when we choose to be present, and choose to be dynamic with our actions, then we can hit spiritual paydirt and the stuff our lives are made of... even in the little nitty-gritty... will lead us to some beautiful causes and special effects. Knowing that what we do has far reaching repurcussions, we may as well do what's intuitively right and love as much as we can while the echoes of our do's and don'ts echo across creation.

Why? Just be-cause, and effect.

jaybird wrote this at 23.34 EST| entry link| your thoughts?|

Birds that sing complex songs give clue to origins of human syntax

jaybird wrote this at 16.55 EST| entry link| your thoughts?|

Dennis Kucinich: The Cadence of Courage, another powerful statement from one of the most genuine leaders in America.

jaybird wrote this at 00.32 EST| entry link| your thoughts?|

Sunday, 16 February, 2003...........................................................

"Viva Agua!"

Water is awesome. Right now, it's power combined with cold has ground a large portion of the United States to a halt. Meanwhile, somewhere, it's irragating a small family farm, flowing down the mouth of a thristy child and making a rainbow. It's flowing through me and growing through you. It's been on my mind all day, mostly since the brain is made of 85% of the stuff. It's astonishing just how much or how little of it determines whether we live or die... we truly live by the blessing, and at the behest of the elements. Today, I thank water.

jaybird wrote this at 21.58 EST| entry link| your thoughts?|

Mutation in creativity gene 'led to rise of Man'

jaybird wrote this at 20.54 EST| entry link| your thoughts?|





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jay/Male/26-30. Lives in United States/North Carolina/Woodfin/New Bridge, speaks English and French. Spends 40% of daytime online. Uses a Normal (56k) connection. And likes creativity/mysticism.
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